Wonderful article! The other day, when I was “complaining” about something to my husband, he asked “well, do you regret being a stay-at-home mother?” Absolutely not. But when I made that choice 14 years ago, I had the expectation that I could return to work when the kids were in school…but, life had other plans. Now I’m homeschooling 2 autistic kids, ages 14 and 6.
The load of “motherhood” is so much more when the children have extra needs. The “mom” cloak that I wear seems that much heavier.
that's so hard, isn't it? when life has other plans and you just have to adapt because if you don't, who will?
and yes, the motherload is more when the kids have bigger needs. yesterday, we had to (gently) hold down my son while giving him his weekly growth hormone shot. he hates them. i hate giving them to him. but his body won't grow without them (his older sister takes the shots, too). i cry almost every time and we've been doing this since february.
this was definitely not in my mom plans, but here we are.
my cloak is absolutely different than yours, but i feel that heavier weight, too.
and i am grateful that we can share our stories because that, in a small way, lifts a tiny bit of the burden.
thank you for your willingness to share with me here.
my pleasure! i love that your piece is the funny version (in some ways) of my essay. i think we need to be able to laugh at this awful stuff, too. otherwise, the heaviness of it all consumes us.
Thank you so much, Amber. For reading but also for that kindness. I don't ever see what I am writing as brave, but necessary to put into words. I love writing and sometimes it's hard, but it feels important. Thank you for letting me know it's as important to you as it feels to me.
As a recently retired midwife, mother, and grandmother your words spoke to me in all the ways. I was lucky to have a very engaged and supportive partner throughout all the wildness of children and career. I clearly remember the overwhelming task of surviving, nurturing, and utter exhaustion. Today’s parenting seems even more difficult. I sometimes have flashbacks as I watch my son and daughter in-law navigate full time work and two young children. The reality that working a lot of hours has become essential and normal for so many families is a tragedy. Thank you for sharing this. I will be passing it along
Wonderful article! The other day, when I was “complaining” about something to my husband, he asked “well, do you regret being a stay-at-home mother?” Absolutely not. But when I made that choice 14 years ago, I had the expectation that I could return to work when the kids were in school…but, life had other plans. Now I’m homeschooling 2 autistic kids, ages 14 and 6.
The load of “motherhood” is so much more when the children have extra needs. The “mom” cloak that I wear seems that much heavier.
that's so hard, isn't it? when life has other plans and you just have to adapt because if you don't, who will?
and yes, the motherload is more when the kids have bigger needs. yesterday, we had to (gently) hold down my son while giving him his weekly growth hormone shot. he hates them. i hate giving them to him. but his body won't grow without them (his older sister takes the shots, too). i cry almost every time and we've been doing this since february.
this was definitely not in my mom plans, but here we are.
my cloak is absolutely different than yours, but i feel that heavier weight, too.
and i am grateful that we can share our stories because that, in a small way, lifts a tiny bit of the burden.
thank you for your willingness to share with me here.
❤️
THIS EXACTLY! I agree with everything times 💯 & thank you for sharing my piece!!! ❤️ 😭
my pleasure! i love that your piece is the funny version (in some ways) of my essay. i think we need to be able to laugh at this awful stuff, too. otherwise, the heaviness of it all consumes us.
Just want to say, I think your writing is consistently so very brave Naomi. Thank you for this labor!
Thank you so much, Amber. For reading but also for that kindness. I don't ever see what I am writing as brave, but necessary to put into words. I love writing and sometimes it's hard, but it feels important. Thank you for letting me know it's as important to you as it feels to me.
As a recently retired midwife, mother, and grandmother your words spoke to me in all the ways. I was lucky to have a very engaged and supportive partner throughout all the wildness of children and career. I clearly remember the overwhelming task of surviving, nurturing, and utter exhaustion. Today’s parenting seems even more difficult. I sometimes have flashbacks as I watch my son and daughter in-law navigate full time work and two young children. The reality that working a lot of hours has become essential and normal for so many families is a tragedy. Thank you for sharing this. I will be passing it along